Merry Christmas everyone. . .

Am I too late to wish you a Merry Christmas??? I would like to think the greeting is never too late. There's the song "12 Days of Christmas" and the saying "Let Every Day Be Christmas" which makes me think "Merry Christmas" will never be ancient anytime of the year. It's been great fun this year round always. As a child, I look forward to Christmas which meant travelling miles to a kampung - visit my maternal grandparents, mindahu, meeting my cousins and of course there is that gifts we kids always 'hope' to get;). As an adult now, the enthusiasm is probably slightly different considering that I have my own family now. Still, the family reunions (busy you know!), carolling, and wrapping of gifts (now for my children) has that same kind of tingling feeling in me.

This time we - just us (Edward, myself and the kids) - spent Christmas as a family. We were up at Kundasang (and even at this moment as I type this, we're still here) having not a white snowy Christmas but a cool, foggy (in exchange of snow!) Christmas. It has been a worthwhile time spent together before school reopens (arrghh...dreading it already). While Edward was busy at the KWM (Kundasang War Memorial) we - the kids and I of course - would be, hmm...lets say snooping around every inch of Kundasang (well almost *giggles*!)

I hope that what ever 'style' your celebration of Christmas was, it was meaningful in many ways. Merry Christmas everyone...

Tamparuli in flames then to ashes...

This was among the first shots I was able to take

at about 6 a.m. . .

. . .at 8.30 a.m. . .

. . .and at 3 p.m.

"I would die for you, lay down my life for you...", sheezzz....the vibration and the ring tone from my handphone within reach woke me up. Checked the time 5.45 a.m., checked the caller - my aunt....hesitantly I answered.

"Hmm...?"
"Tamparuli on fire! Ru Lim's block!"
"Wheennn..?"
"Now lah...still burning oh...we're going there already."

The line went dead. I rushed out of the room and found two inhabitants of my parents home watching football...well, probably that since they mentioned it previously.

"Shops on fire. Come!"

Wait...I had to retrace my steps back to the room...realized that I only had a big, flimsy t-shirt on *giggles*. Slipped into what I really needed, grabbed my camera bag, threw my car keys to Andy and off we went to witness the flames devouring every bit of the old wooden block of shops. Well, down it went and so were the speculation of many who were there. A lil' bit of excitement today....that and bringing the kids like almost every hour there to satisfy their every excuse to see the fire-engines, firemen/policemen at work, what remains of the burnt block and of course their search of keropok and ice-cream.

Sleepless nights. . .

It was sleepless nights for me the past few nights. Ed has the ugly looking blisters of chicken pox. He had fever, ulcers and a very bad sore throat last Monday and knowing our boy Ed, who had his share of ins and outs of the Likas Hospital, I got him to drink kembang semangkuk (it works wonders you know;)) and of course got him to see a doctor immediately. The doctor's prognosis was Ed had flu. Hmm. . .however, Wednesday welcomed the chicken pox and by Friday it was all over him. He'd wake up at night asking for milk but I realize that he would only hug his bottle of warm milk to sleep. He'd cry on and on at times and it breaks my heart to see him in pain. I would cuddle him, rub his back, wipe away his tears just to at least ease his 'duduh mommy'. Eventually, he'll fall back to sleep. Every hour or so, I got up to check on him. Fever? Did he pee?

Edward was and is still away for work purposes. I am thankful that he was around during the weekend so I got to get my beauty sleep while he took over the task of checking the kids, especially Ed, at night. Yesterday, Ed was his usual self - mischievous, naughty and a pain to the butt(lol) to his other two siblings - eases my tensed shoulders though;) Edward called to check on us at night and knowing that Ed was getting better, we were able to be in the mood of exchanging naughty sms (lol).

Well, the blisters are drying up but I guess we'll still be cooped up at home till they're really gone. Heard the thing is going around. . .chicken pox I mean. I received an sms from my cousin Donna last night and her girl Carmen has it too. Hmm. . .so we might as well watch out not for Santa but probably for the infectious chicken pox this X'mas season. It may just be under our trees this year!!!

Our idea of a birthday celebration....

Our idea of a birthday celebration this year was:

a) Spending two nights at The Cottage Hotel, Kundasang

It's a new resort with reasonable price RM 108 - heater, astro, wi-fi etc..

b) Watching the 4x4 Pesta Kubis Challenge

However, most of the time I find myself watching the two boys, Ed & Nell. They had their

own mini 4x4 in the mud when the vehicles got stuck;)

c) Spending time with the kids
It was a so called pay-back time after leaving them a week at my parents
just because of the Borneo Safari



d) Appreciating nature
This was taken at home a few minutes after we arrived from Kundasang. It was drizzling
and the kids were shouting, "Mommy, take a picture of the rainbow." Why not, especially at
almost the close of the day.



d) Feasting on a cake

Edward surprised me with a durian cake which he ordered from Trixie.

Lucky us, the kids were not so into durian. . .so we had it all to ourselves.

e) Ehemm....had time to "pak toh" also

As I was trying to put candles on the cake, the kids were jostling each other to see who gets to count the candles first. They counted and I heard them whispering....

"Huh??? Mommy is 5 years old?"

"Like me?"

"No, you're not yet 5."

"Ya lah, but next month I'll be."

"Cannot lah. Mommy not budak-budak anymore."

"Ok, you count the candles again."

And so they counted again. I can't help but smile at how kids can come up with funny things to say and funny solution to a problem. I trace my steps back to the life at 31. There were rough and smooth rides, ups and downs, bitter and sweet....you name it. The norm of life but it makes life more colourful and more meaningful. As I close that chapter of my life, I hope in the years to come if I get a chance to leaf through its pages again, I could say those experiences help me grow....

As of now, hmmm....I wouldn't want to tally the candles on the cake but instead I want to count the blessings that God has given to us...

My thoughts at random. . .

At work....

1. Bored....completed what needs to be done here and loves the idea of 'vanishing' before 12.30 ;P

2. Counting days....hols just 'round the corner

3. Baby Ed's birthday....need to do something....

4. Durian...indulge in the creamy and bitter taste soon....MUST be bitter ah....

5. Where is Beevy??? Caught a glimpse of her earlier....

6. Glad got to key-in marks last week....a long queue now ....

7. Another weekend escapade???

8. Cake Mania

9. Thinking

10. Missing....Edward....

Hope to relax soon....

Edward and Philip Chai on RAW

Japanese Team

River at Ulu Kimanis campsite

Sunset at Pimping Beach

Sunrise at Pimping Beach

It was another exciting opportunity to be part of the Borneo Safari 2008 event. We were flagged off with tyres squealing and engines vrooming down Gaya Street on 26 October and only returned to comfort zone on 2 November. The journey offroading was not as challenging as last year but still the experience - watching the adrenalin-rush men pushing their 'toys' to their limit, enjoying time off from work, nature, being away from the kids:( - is one I wouldn't want to miss again. Although it was a different phase of work I get there but I sure had a relaxing escapade.

Being in school these last two weeks would be like hell ;P. Documentation to do, handing over files, students to see for last minute thingy and lots more before we go off for the hols. I think back of the one week escapade - cooling in any river we get to, listening to crickets at night, sunsets/sunrise, reading in peace, the early morning walks - hmm, how I wish....It's peaceful and quiet here at home now and I am relishing every moment of that Ed and Edward wake up. I am even contemplating on sneaking out just to wander down the road to SASS and probably do a bit of "clicking" here and there. Reality checks!!! Arrgghhh, I'll trudge this last mile for this year by maybe just looking further down the road....any greener pastures???

As kids see it. . .

I was driving slowly towards my mom's place when I noticed my two kids wandering about with their two friends at the parking lot near their school. I rolled down the window and was about to 'lecture' them on 'I told you not to go out' thingy but I held my peace when I noticed my daughter's tear stained cheeks.

Her story. . .

Jan Jan (my cousin) and the other boys laughed when Able (a smaller boy) fell. They didn't even help him get up and so we did (pointing to herself, my son and Able's sister Avie). Now, they don't even want to play with Able.

Then, tears came streaming down her cheeks. I looked at Avie and she was also in tears. While the two were crying, I looked at the 'victim'. . .there was indeed a bruise on his head and mud streaks on parts of his face. But he was smiling as if nothing happened.

Kids....they have compassion for even the tiniest and simplest thing in life. . . .

Sunsets

A quickie. Just to share. . .taken at one of the resorts in Tuaran. It was on one of the Saturday evenings when the kids would just say "Come lets go jalan-jalan." So off we go....jalan-jalan and sharing one of the many things we love with our children...

Hoping a restful break. . .

It had been a hell of a week. . . .;p) I hope (*fingers crossed*) this week would be a restful one coz it's suppose to be a one week school break. We had exams in school, papers to mark, deadlines to meet, an exam to study for and still the packing to do at home. Exams and papers to mark. . .well not to say that I'm lucky or what but 2 of the 4 classes I got could be rated as 'weak' students so going through their papers was not a arduous task. Deadlines. . .there was a lot of running here and there involved. Hope that would help me shed those extra kg, but to no avail. (*giggles*) Exam. . .geezzz, I've been asking students to study yet here I am in the same boat. It's just days away but I'm still goyang kaki. 98% of things at the present home have gone through relocation already while the other 2% will be a last minute thing then. There goes my hopefully relaxed break then....

Well, to start of this week, I went to a garage sale. . .lots of interesting items and my kids managed to wheedle their way deeper into my pockets. Nothing for me this time though I managed to bargain a bracelet from my cousin who got it from the same garage sale later in the afternoon. Such a terrible thing to do especially to a younger cousin (*whatever :p)

That's it then all. . .will try to blog some time again....

Can I forget....

Do you find it hard forgetting something you are suppose to forget??? A girlfriend was sharing something 'painful' she was going through and I was at lost for words to comfort her. I couldn't find the right, soothing, calming words that some could do. She'd walk to and fro with her gestures here and there and all I did was sit, watch, nod plus the 'uh uhs' and 'hmms'. She'll stop and look at me and says "Ok Lola, you're here to listen. . ." then continues rambling. Then she pops the question "Can you forget. . ."

I reflected back on her question and wonder whether I could possibly forget and just simply delete something from my memory especially when it has a very strong impact in my life. The truth is I guess it's difficult to do so. At times when I've convince myself that I have put it behind me, it'll creep up at odd times!!!! Some say share it but probably the 'shoulder' I cry on is not comfy or spongy enough to absorb all the tears and. . . saliva;P. Then I guess it's back to making peace with the memory of it.....ooohh, the intricacies that life has to offer.

But, any chance of doing so?

An update???

Weiiii, really am a terrible blogger. . .it's been way past a month since my last rants and ramblings. Busy??? You can say so. It's those days when work piles up and need immediate attention while at home...hmm another phase in my daily routine that really needs undivided attention.

There were inspectrates from KPM inspecting every nook and corner of the workplace and even eyeing every movement we made....to find faults?? Nah, not really so they say but rather to lead us back to the so called right track from which we have detoured. It was a tensed one week for most of us with some colleagues receiving very discouraging comments. But just to reflect on it made me smile....we were so prim and proper with guys in ties and the ladies neatly dressed. After the nazirs left, gone were the ties and the neatly dressed. Just to please lah....

Then there's the frenzy packing business again. Packing seems endless. I have packed heaps of boxes and gave away a few things for the SASS Jumble Sale yet things doesn't seem to get less. Yep, we're moving. It's just a few meters away from the present house we are at. On a hill overlooking Kg Pangasaan with the view of Mt Kinabalu if the clouds permit it is were home will be very soon. Home, no house rent to pay for!!! Hey, but in the process of the home to materialize....there was 'digging deeper into the pocket'. It will be worth it though. Edward complains about time and hands....if he had extra hours to the 24 we already have and extra hands of his own, then he sighs.....

I miss a lot of things - badminton, our sunset walks at the beach, reading and also the IH music making and chit chats. Hopefully soon we do get the time to do-re-mi!!!

Well, cries for undivided attention at home could be heard probably all through out Kg Pangasaan. Will keep posting;) Cheerio people.....

Finally....

Finally, found the time and means to upload a picture here....a very dusty looking Ed playing at his favorite spot at my parents' place. Right at this moment as I am frantically hitting keys on my laptop, he's sound asleep. His sleeping patterns are topsy turvy these days. He may either fall asleep very early and be the alarm clock the following day or he may stay awake till late at night and wake up late morning. Pity him because we have to carry him then(which would of course wake up a grouchy 'baby') to send him to my parents before my bro sends him to nursery. Nursery doesn't open till 7 a.m. but I have to leave early as not to acquire a very red print on the punchcard.

That's it for now....enjoy what is left of a blissful weekend amigos, coz I am with a bunch more of chores to finish before Ed wakes up ;-p Is that blissful then? Hahahaha. . . .

It's been a while....

It's been a while, eh? Yep, I've neglected this small portion for my rants and ramblings. It has been busy days....being a mom to three aggressive, trying yet wonderful kids plus a cikgu to students from all walks of life plus being a do-re-mi teacher at home plus....and a few more other beings. Sometimes, I feel it weighing down on me as I sit pondering the day's achievements or disappointments (if any ;)) A few months back, a friend commented about getting to do something for oneself - engaging yourself in a new interest for one - so as to loosen a bit or maybe a lot of the tension brewing in life. Guess what....I did, not in one but a few and so far I haven't regretted it.

Two of my IH girlfriends were looking at the world around through their eyes - photography! On their encouragement, I risked *giggles* myself getting one dslr. Regrets? None whatsoever. My sociable seven, frustrating four and terrible two kids were always my subjects. Models in the making with their many faces of expressions. Haven't gotten myself a 'partner in crime' though since one of the girlfriends has left for greener pastures (better chewing material for the cows!!) and one will be leaving soon. Well, a sharing partner is always around, but he gets to be the model most of the time!!!

Another one is......hmmm, got to leave that for another post. There's the sound of Edward's 'vrooming' home from taking out the rubbish.

Cheerio people! Have a wonderful and relaxing weekend!!!

Friends who care....

I came across a very familiar envelope this week as I was putting stuff into boxes. I stared at the self made but very creative envelope. Didn't realize that I had kept it over the years. It stirred memories - mixed feelings, a search of identity, and attempts of self "destruction" (not suicide though!) I touched it, undecided whether to get a glimpse of its contents yet again. My daughter looked at me with her "what-is-that mommy" look and I simply said "Oh, its nothing." I put it aside and continued to pack things but "curiousity killed the cat" - not that I have forgotten its contents! I read it and read it again. It was a very comforting and encouraging as well as touching letter - I still think it is. I remember going through a tough time while at SAUC - not financially or socially but spiritually. Somehow, someone must have sensed, seen or felt the rough weather I was at and decided to "kay poh"! I almost tore it into pieces but decided against it. Looking back now, I'm glad the letter shook me and brought some senses into me. I smiled as I folded the letter and slipped it back into the envelope. I'm glad there were friends who cared and there will always be friends who care....

Oh by the way, the letter was signed "God" with a P.S Sorry for the spelling errors if there were any, my secretary is human. Forgive her! *giggles*

Imagine....

We meet after a long time and we talked till 12 midnight in your room with lights off and no one else was at home. Then, your phone rings downstairs. I asked you to come back after taking the call and of course you promised you would. The person on the phone tells you that I died last night. Would you come back to your room as promised?

The ball is round....

Where have I been???? Around....hahahaha, the kids wanted to stay over at my parents for a few days since their daddy was away. A blessing in disguise I would say coz I had the chance to sneak a peek MU vs. Chelsea with my bros!!!! Haven't done that for quite sometime since my other half is not as fanatic as I am with this football thing. However if you just whisper mud, tyres, man & machine he'll just drop everything!!! Which team am I a fan of??? Long time ago I used to love Chelsea but I would always lose some RM to my brothers who are die hard fans of MU. While watching the game, I still cheered for both, taking no sides at all! The reason - play safe ;) Had a few kicks on field myself during Teachers' Day too. Strained some muscles and still agonizing over it but...I enjoyed myself! My thought - the ball is round, anything can happen!!!

The little boss of the house is whining so its back to undivided attention to him now. Cheerio people!!!

forgetful???

I scored again for forgetting a kettle on the stove. I got that look - you know when someone is mad at you - from my roommate. "Eeee.....kau ni, lupa itu air. Bahaya betul." Well, what could I do but look at him probably with that "minta kesian" look and just smile...I bet he got pissed off, as always *giggles n frowns* Even worse this time coz am at my usual spot at this time of nite....that is in front of my laptop screen doing who knows what but facebooking and blogging *lol* Well, on my part I wouldn't entirely blame the sophisticated technology we have now coz after a busy and hectic day from work to house chores and entertaining my kids, this is where I unwind for the day....ehemm, of course after the little ones are in their dream world. Forgetful then? Blaming on age? Nah, I don't think so. Quoting a friend, age is just a number....young or old we still tend to forget. But I guess one thing that I certainly would not forget is friends who are around. They are part of who we are. What say you???

Well, au revoir for now...better sign off before someone says I may forget where I sleep tonight *giggles*

woohoo....

woohoo....a very eventful week I had...even today was. Yummy food on the menu for lunch, laughed a lot with friends and made music too!!! A very good anti-stress prescription, I can say. Something that I look forward too come weekdays. We a.k.a In Harmony - this singing group we have - had this jamming session (recording;p) again today. Hmmm, takes hours to be an artiste just to get a few pieces of papers with do-re-mi perfect-oh!!! But I think we had fun in a way coz I did. Like Ogy commented on AF "Music is a journey of the soul", I guess we and music lovers out there have our own "journey of the soul" to tamper with. By composing every note along the way with feelings/harmony, eventually we'll get to the finale with applauses and probably 'amens' *giggles*.......geez, am sounding somewhat like a preacher.......maybe its the time getting to me!!!! *lol* Yep, I'm in a new day...didn't realize that. Anyway, just a thought. I guess that means I've got to start snoring too like the rest of the pack. Ciao!

Pssttt, btw J thanks for the encouragement...that is if u get to read this blog of mine again.

How time flies

I'm glad its weeken'd! Pheww....it was a hectic week even with a day of rest on Thursday but piles of work to complete! My fingers are on the keys but I find myself dozing off *lol* Kids are asleep so I get to relax and unwind a bit. Kids....yepp, there's Enya, Nell and Ed...snoring lightly away. As I was preparing dinner earlier this evening, Edward was saying something like if Enya was the only kid around, she would probably be lonely. Her brothers kept pestering her about something and she had to catch up with them and whatever they had to say. She'll bring them water, she'll accompany them to pee *giggles* and she'll sing to them if they wantedher too. Hey, not giving the impression they do not get into a fight...ohh they do. Baby Ed gets his way most of the time. As I stood holding a spatula (like I said I was preparing dinner;)) watching Enya and her brothers in the living room entertaining themselves, I said to myself "How time flies!" They've grown from babies to 7, 5 and 3 year olds this year. . .hmm, soon they'll be on their own*sighs* This rearing kids is not a simple task...i realize that. But I guess down the road, I'll be missing those "Mommy, I want...."

They are sound asleep now....and I get to blog. . .;)

Hmmm....

Had fun watching man and machine in action today though I missed the best part....yesterday....so my roommate said. In between the rolling of wheels, I managed to steal time and got started on an old book "The Omega Game". Hmmm....another game...*lol*...my "roommie" didn't get to go in action....probably freaking out if another dent gets to the body of the "suzuki hummer?" nah, not worth getting it they say! No regrets whatsoever for the sweat under the hot and scorching sun...

Nightie nite ppl....happy rollin' n wheelin'!

i pause a while.....

Life is full of choices. And it challenges us to choose what we think is the best. I always pause a while after going through "The Road Not Taken" with my class. Though weak in the language but this poem always manage to open up the minds of my students. Their non-ending thoughts and questions provoke my own inner thoughts and feelings; and I'll reflect on various aspects in my own life....sometimes making connections to the poem. Satisfied with what I've chosen? Happy? Regret? Sorry? Angry? Envy? Hmmm, so the list would go on but at the end of the day what would really matter is the coming days and how I would make them part of me. . . .